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Gov. Roy Barnes was assaulted at Macon's Medical Center of Central Georgia when he inadvertently placed his hand on a little girl's knee. Five-year-old Dukeshia Bopper said, "I don't like strangers touching me, he got in my space and I punched his nose." Gov. Barnes apologized for alarming the girl and said he didn't intend to press charges on the assault.

Bubba Hawkins Used Bridge Parts was the victim of vandalism and graffiti perpetrated by an obscure Egyptian gang in Putnam County. The gang is noted for their elaborate detail and the use of brushes rather than spray paint. Scholars are working to decipher the hieroglyphic messages scattered in their graffiti. Distraught over the ongoing defacement of his merchandise, Hawkins has placed the entire enterprise on the market for sale.

In his inauguration speech, Jack Ellis said he plans to make transportation and crime two of his priorities along with the flag, mom and apple pie. "Transportation is really important to me, heck, I had to thumb a ride over here. I didn't relish the idea of walking through a crime-infested neighborhood to get to this building. Luckily for me, I had my lovely wife with me which makes it much easier to get a lift. I don't care if you're the mayor, it's not easy for a black man to thumb a ride. Heck, Billy Graham and the Pope would have a hard time thumbing a ride these days," Ellis said.

Budget discussions got out of hand and the heat sparked a brushfire nearby. An anyonymous firefighter said, "I wish they would warn us before they start these Macon city budget meetings...hey! I just had a thought. Let's have barbequed pork for supper. Call Jimmy at the firehouse while I gather up some embers..."

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If I clamp this hand over her mouth, I bet we could skip the debate on road stripe colors and get back to new roads business. What do you think?

Former Bibb school superintendent, Gene Buinger

The only thing worse than these going away parties is going to Bibb County budget hearings. Dang! That's a depressing thought...

Come on, Mom! The school board got more than that at the last county budget hearing.

Jack must have really wanted my vote. Wow! That 10^th boilermaker is really going to my head. I-I-I c-c-can't f-feel my feet...and the street is tilting...

 I hate cleaning up after these city council picnics.

Photo from WMAC website

OK, guys. WHO made that disgusting and offensive sound on the air?